Selin' a shin pad

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful, young girl. She was a strange one, this girl. Nay, she did not comb her long black hair, pin it into a bun with chopsticks, wash herself in a wooden bucket. Nay, she did not fall for the knight in shining armour who had been wooing her for days and days. Nay, she did not gracefully sit herself on an old, oak chair and complete her embroidery. Nay she did not take a sparkling, Waterford glass and sip her prestigious 1889 shiraz. Nay did she gleefully test the flavours from her bubbling pot of broth. Nay did she keep her husband company while they dined at the grand table.

All she did was sell her damn shin pads, whilst eating her rotten star-shaped eggs.

You're welcome for the dedication Sel :D

~heelorli